Every day I think about my children getting home and my not being there. I thank G-d that they have no "real" homework and that they are not really going to suffer academically because I am not there until bedtime.
I think about the missed baths, cuddles, stories, snacks, projects, opportunities.
I wonder if the rush in the morning is worth it. Would I care about the girls fighting with me not to wear a particular shirt, skirt, pair of tights if it didn't mean another few minutes that I would be late for work.
But then there is the flip side:
Tuition
Camp
Mortgage
Food
Health Insurance
Also, I do love where I work and the people I work with. I admit I love the prestige of my job and the complements I get when people hear where I work.
But lately, I don't love WHAT I do. And some of the sacrifices AT work don't seem worth it. I am being backed into a corner and being asked to look at a future there that has a lot less appeal.
There are also the little factors of my health, well-being, and happiness to consider.
Lately, the scale of Cheshbon has been much more wobbly, much more tilted in favor of leaving this job.
But what about...
(I guess Camp would not be an issue.)
Tuition
Mortgage
Food
Health Insurance
THE ECONOMY??
It makes it harder to get up and go every morning.
I am faced with what is perhaps the biggest dilemma of my life so far.
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